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Right said Fred, both of us together, one each end and steady as we go

Tried to to shift it, couldn`t even lift it, we was getting nowhere

And so, we, had a cup of tea



Right said Fred, give a shout to Charlie, up comes Charlie from

the floor below

After straining, heaving and complaining, we was getting nowhere

And so, we, had a cup of tea



Charlie had a think and he thought we ought, to take off all the handles

And the things that hold the candles - but it did no good (well

I never thought it would!)



Right said Fred, have to take the feet off, to get them feet

off wouldn`t take a mo...

Took its feet off, even with the seat off, should have got us

somewhere, but no!

So Fred said let`s have another cup of tea, and we said "right-oh!"



Right said Fred, have to take the door off, need more space to

shift the so-and-so

Had bad twinges, taking off the hinges, and it got us nowhere

And so, we, had a cup of tea



Right said Fred, have to take the wall down, that there wall

is gonna have to go

Took the wall down, even with it all down, we was getting nowhere

And so, we, had a cup of tea



Charlie had a think and and he said look Fred, I`ve got a sort of feeling

If we remove the ceiling,

With a rope or two we can drop the blighter through...



Right said Fred, climbing up a ladder, with his crowbar gave a mighty blow

Was he in trouble, half a ton of rubble, landed on the top of, his dome

So Charlie and me had another cup of tea

And then we, went home!



[Spoken, fading out...]

I said to Charlie we`ll just have to leave it standing on the

landing, that`s all.

You see the trouble with Fred is, he`s too hasty.

Now you never get nowhere if you`re too hasty...

Right said Fred, both of us together, one each end and steady as we go

Tried to to shift it, couldn`t even lift it, we was getting nowhere

And so, we, had a cup of tea



Right said Fred, give a shout to Charlie, up comes Charlie from

the floor below

After straining, heaving and complaining, we was getting nowhere

And so, we, had a cup of tea



Charlie had a think and he thought we ought, to take off all the handles

And the things that hold the candles - but it did no good (well

I never thought it would!)



Right said Fred, have to take the feet off, to get them feet

off wouldn`t take a mo...

Took its feet off, even with the seat off, should have got us

somewhere, but no!

So Fred said let`s have another cup of tea, and we said "right-oh!"



Right said Fred, have to take the door off, need more space to

shift the so-and-so

Had bad twinges, taking off the hinges, and it got us nowhere

And so, we, had a cup of tea



Right said Fred, have to take the wall down, that there wall

is gonna have to go

Took the wall down, even with it all down, we was getting nowhere

And so, we, had a cup of tea



Charlie had a think and and he said look Fred, I`ve got a sort of feeling

If we remove the ceiling,

With a rope or two we can drop the blighter through...



Right said Fred, climbing up a ladder, with his crowbar gave a mighty blow

Was he in trouble, half a ton of rubble, landed on the top of, his dome

So Charlie and me had another cup of tea

And then we, went home!



[Spoken, fading out...]

I said to Charlie we`ll just have to leave it standing on the

landing, that`s all.

You see the trouble with Fred is, he`s too hasty.

Now you never get nowhere if you`re too hasty...

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