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Don`t ask me why
But I was walking down the streets
Of Fairfax, California
And I saw this flyer hangin`
On a telephone pole, and it said
CAN GOD FILL TEETH?

For a $10 "donation"
You could see silver fillings turn
To gold and other "supernormal dental happenings."
New caps! Filled cavities! Bring a
Flashlight and a mirror and observe

But wait a minute
Didn`t I just read
About how the cops are getting parents
To plant bugging devices
In their kids` teeth
So if they disappear they can track `em
Before they wind up on the backs of milk cartons
And all that

And didn`t I read
That these devices can go two-way
And everything that I do or say
Is all goin` on tape somewhere right now
Planted in my cavities
And they didn`t even tell me
no wonder every bad thing
In and out of my mouth
Keeps winding up on my employment record

All those fillings
All those crowns
I`ll show them
Who`s the boss of my big mouth

Where`s the pliars
God dammit! Where`s the pliars?!?
Wilma! Where`d you put my electric drill
This is all coming out now-TODAY!

CHORUS
Agh! Agh! Agh!
Agh! Agh! Agh!
Agh! Agh! Agh!

Must be some kind of conspiracy
The whole world`s a God damn conspiracy
Look anywhere long enough, you`re gonna find a conspiracy
Man, LIFE is a conspiracy!

CHORUS

Needlenose
Up my nose
-Agh!-
Where did all these wires come from?
How far up into my skull do they go
I pull out more and more copper spagetti

How`d my Weekly World News get all w wet?
God damn fishsticks melted again
What are they trying to do to me?
No secrets in the land of the free!

There
no one`s gonna tell me what to do
It`s worth eating baby food
The rest of my life
To be a free man
Bastards
Probably wouldn`t understand me anyway

Don`t ask me why
But I was walking down the streets
Of Fairfax, California
And I saw this flyer hangin`
On a telephone pole, and it said
CAN GOD FILL TEETH?

For a $10 "donation"
You could see silver fillings turn
To gold and other "supernormal dental happenings."
New caps! Filled cavities! Bring a
Flashlight and a mirror and observe

But wait a minute
Didn`t I just read
About how the cops are getting parents
To plant bugging devices
In their kids` teeth
So if they disappear they can track `em
Before they wind up on the backs of milk cartons
And all that

And didn`t I read
That these devices can go two-way
And everything that I do or say
Is all goin` on tape somewhere right now
Planted in my cavities
And they didn`t even tell me
no wonder every bad thing
In and out of my mouth
Keeps winding up on my employment record

All those fillings
All those crowns
I`ll show them
Who`s the boss of my big mouth

Where`s the pliars
God dammit! Where`s the pliars?!?
Wilma! Where`d you put my electric drill
This is all coming out now-TODAY!

CHORUS
Agh! Agh! Agh!
Agh! Agh! Agh!
Agh! Agh! Agh!

Must be some kind of conspiracy
The whole world`s a God damn conspiracy
Look anywhere long enough, you`re gonna find a conspiracy
Man, LIFE is a conspiracy!

CHORUS

Needlenose
Up my nose
-Agh!-
Where did all these wires come from?
How far up into my skull do they go
I pull out more and more copper spagetti

How`d my Weekly World News get all w wet?
God damn fishsticks melted again
What are they trying to do to me?
No secrets in the land of the free!

There
no one`s gonna tell me what to do
It`s worth eating baby food
The rest of my life
To be a free man
Bastards
Probably wouldn`t understand me anyway

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