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Brighten up you home, it said in the advert
All your decorating done by an expert
How the hell was I to know he`s such a dirty sod
I wanted subtle shades, maybe something black
There`s paint on the chairs & the dogs a different colour
I`m the only bloke I know that does have a day-glo scullery...

[Chorus:]
Dez the demon...never coming back, he`s never coming back ooeee
Dez the demon...never get a cheque, he`ll never get a cheque from me
Dez the demon decorator

He split a tin o`gloss coz he`s a clumsy swine
"I`ll paint the carpet pink, I`ve got no turpentine"
Pink footprints everywhere reminding me
The neighbours came for tea & they began to frown
The wallpaper was cock-eyed, flowers upside down
What the flippen `ecks that decorating clown done now...
[Chorus.... Guitar Bit]

Dez the demons deed is done, my house is an eye-sore
Bumps & Lumps in the wallpaper, paint splashed on the floor
I won`t be calling Dez the demon, won`t be calling Dez the demon
I won`t be calling Dez the demon decorator anymore...
[Chorus]

Brighten up you home, it said in the advert
All your decorating done by an expert
How the hell was I to know he`s such a dirty sod
I wanted subtle shades, maybe something black
There`s paint on the chairs & the dogs a different colour
I`m the only bloke I know that does have a day-glo scullery...

[Chorus:]
Dez the demon...never coming back, he`s never coming back ooeee
Dez the demon...never get a cheque, he`ll never get a cheque from me
Dez the demon decorator

He split a tin o`gloss coz he`s a clumsy swine
"I`ll paint the carpet pink, I`ve got no turpentine"
Pink footprints everywhere reminding me
The neighbours came for tea & they began to frown
The wallpaper was cock-eyed, flowers upside down
What the flippen `ecks that decorating clown done now...
[Chorus.... Guitar Bit]

Dez the demons deed is done, my house is an eye-sore
Bumps & Lumps in the wallpaper, paint splashed on the floor
I won`t be calling Dez the demon, won`t be calling Dez the demon
I won`t be calling Dez the demon decorator anymore...
[Chorus]

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